Are you ready to submit to the domination of Jaxton Wheeler?
The glorification of BDSM through Hollywood blockbusters such as Fifty Shades of Grey, have made the Dom/Sub relationship the “it” fetish of the last decade. Like anything in Hollywood, sex sells but is that all there is to BDSM? Is it merely just fucking in a harness?
I sat down with Dom Porn Daddy Mr Jaxton Wheeler to find out more.
Firstly, Jaxton, welcome to London and thank you for taking the time to come and chat to us about this. Anybody who follows your social media knows that you are pretty much the Dom Daddy of the porn industry! So would you say, that Hollywood’s representation of BDSM and the Dom/Sub relationship an accurate one?
It’s not accurate in the slightest. As you said, sex sells and this is what Hollywood is focusing on and you can’t blame them, they gotta make money out of what they do. Domination and submission though extends far beyond sex. As much as I love fucking in a harness, that’s only a small part of the Dom/Sub relationship.
When you think about it, domination and submission is the cornerstone of how our society works. There is inherent subordination in the workplace, you’re there to work and our entire history is just one long saga of one society dominating another. Some people lead in this world and some just follow. It’s just how the world works. One misconception about domination though, is that people think it’s an inherently bad thing. Forcing your power over another but that’s not always the case.
My Dom Gang Project is a testament to that.
Can’t really argue with you there. Our history is just one big power struggle between groups. When you say though, that domination isn’t an inherently bad thing. What do you mean by this?
I mean domination as a concept isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it’s all about your perception of it. Of course there are certain cases where domination is bad. One country oppressing the people of another, is a case in point. If you look at how relationships work between people though, you’ll see that domination isn’t always damaging. Your teachers when you were at school dominated you, teaching you and helping shape you as people. They were the leaders and you followed. A true Dom/Sub relationship, is based on this very concept of bettering one’s subordinate. How can that be viewed as a bad thing? It’s about growth and development.
I never really thought about it like that. So the Dom/Sub relationship, is all about growth and betterment?
Exactly! My job as a Dom is to better the life of my Sub, helping them grow as a person and make better choices in life. This ethos is the driving force behind the Dom Gang Project. No attachment to sex or porn but to build a network of individuals that are there to lead and better the lives of others. To have leaders within the LGBTQ community that help their subordinates lead healthier lives, make better choices and be more grounded and comfortable in their own bodies. Kind of like a trust network, that people can rely on.
Do you think there is a current gap within the LGBTQ community, in which people need this leadership?
I think currently, there is definitely a need for a guiding force within the LGBTQ community. We’re not a nation, we have no president and we have no government. We are people living within societies, that often don’t fully accept us. There are pride events around the world but these events are a long cry from what they were originally intended to do. The first pride events were riots, in which the LGBTQ community stood up and said they’d had enough of the discrimination.
Nowadays, we put so much emphasis onto the sexual aspect of our sexuality, that we have lost sight of this. Tell me the last Pride event you went to, that wasn’t just one big party? People travel to Pride events all over the globe, not to show their Pride but to get laid.
This toxic masculinity that is so prevalent in our community is one of the many reasons we need leadership. So many people feel if they are not wanted sexually, they are not wanted at all. This is a misconception, that needs to change! People need to find love for themselves and stop focusing on insecurities, based on a made up sexual food chain. We need to remember, that although our sexuality is part of us. It doesn’t define us! Whilst I have a platform to do so, I’m gonna do everything I can to change this and help our community evolve.
You spoke about the Dom Gang Project involving Doms supporting their Subs lead better and healthier lives. How exactly do they support this change? And how will the Doms/Leaders be selected for this project?
I think it boils down to three main areas – personal development, life coaching and personal training. None of which are to do with sex. When Subs are paired with their Doms, the Dom will take time to learn about their Subs and find out what truly makes them tick. Once this understanding has been established, the Dom can start to implement changes to better the life of their Sub. Whether this is through physical changes/actions or cognitive/behavioural changes. The goal for this relationship is to isolate the factors that need to change, for the Sub to meet the goals in life they want to achieve. Many Subs aren’t inherently submissive personalities but they are lacking guidance. This is what the Dom Project is designed to do, to be a positive influence and offer guidance to the LGBTQ community.
With this goal in mind, our Leaders will be evaluated on the following questions. Are they going to have a positive impact to their Subs? Can they stand independently, making informed and healthy choices in their lives? Will they recognise what others need and want out of life? Most importantly, will they be humble and never judge on face value alone? They need to have a desire to help others and not perpetuate the toxic masculinity within our community. Our community needs role models, not another Instagram poster-boy.
You know I think you’re right, our community really does need role models and the Dom Gang philosophy, is definitely one I can get behind. We all need more self-love in our lives and sometimes, that push in the right direction is all we ever need. If any of our readers would like to get in involved, as either a Leader or Sub. What’s the best way of them getting in touch?
The best way would be to contact me directly via either Instagram or Twitter and I’ll be able to guide you through the initial steps. I’m striving for this to be a family-like network and a positive and safe community. So if you would like to get involved in any capacity, I would love you to get in touch! This is all about creating a more positive future for our
community. Hopefully I’ll be speaking to some of you very soon.