Behind the scenes of a sensual massage for men.
Are you ready for a happy ending?
Working under the title of MassageForHim, Jamie is a London-based masseur who films his sensual sessions with men and shares them with the world through the fan-subscription channels.
Jamie was recently a guest on the podcast, Naked Men Talking.
In the conversation, we talk exhibitionism, building trust and rapport, and why everyone can benefit from learning some massage techniques.
Well, I guess let's start with the beginning, how did you come to realise that massage was your thing? Is it something you've always been interested in?
No, not always. I guess 10 years ago, maybe a bit longer.
I discovered it was my thing and so it's taken off from there.
How did you discover it?
I've always been quite exhibitionist, so that's what prompted it. I like being watched, I guess.
I was looking online for opportunities to fulfil that - you know when you go down sort of rabbit-holes online searching for things?
I’m very familiar with that.
I guess serendipity brought it to me, but I came across a website called Sensual Massage Movies and they were looking for amateurs who wanted to be in a massage movie.
Obviously there was all sorts of anxiety around it, but I saved the website, mulled it over a few times. Eventually, I built up the courage to apply.
I sent off my application and I got a response, asking me to go along and meet with them.
I nearly didn’t go - on the one hand was all the anxiety about it but on the other hand, I wanted to be in a movie.
Everything was better than I’d been expecting. I just had to lay on the table and receive a happy-ending style massage.
I felt very comfortable with the guy who was organising it and filming it. I went back a few times and did a few more. I think it was about the third time that the roles were reversed and I was delivering the massage.
Was that something that you were confident in doing? Had you done any message training at all?
No, but it’s not really about the massage. You just have to be a bit intuitive.
I found that I liked it - I actually enjoyed giving the massage more than receiving.
The performance element of it? Was that your exhibitionism kicking in?
Yeah, sort of.
You're more active in the scene.
I became a bit of a regular performer.
The guy who was filming suggested that I try taking up the massage professionally.
So, I got myself set up and that’s how it started.
What was it about actually becoming a masseur that appealed to you?
I found it very relaxing. I like meeting new people.
I liked also the feedback that you get - it’s actually quite validating if someone's prepared to hire you. It's such an intimate experience to go for a sensual massage.
About as intimate as it gets.
Exactly. So I kind of sometimes think it's me who's receiving the treatment because I get something out of it because someone has chosen me to be the masseur and to spend that intimate time with me.
I like that validation.
It's also quite a nice way to earn money because there's a lot of flexibility in it.
You can do it as much or as little as you want.
You talked about how it's an intimate experience - I was wondering how you build rapport or build that sort of sense of trust with someone when they turn up for their first massage with you and you get them naked on your table?
I've got a website for client massages and I write a blog on there, which helps to reveal a bit of my personality - there's pictures of me and a demo video as well. If someone looks at that, they kind of get to know you a little bit.
Then they contact me and we start to build a rapport through the communication.
By the time they walk through the door, quite a lot of the groundwork has been done.
Then it’s about creating the right atmosphere in the room. We have a brief chat. We do some breathing exercises, and I’ll start out with a head massage.
After that, everyone is different. Some people, it's their first massage with a guy, so they're coming from a very different position to someone who's maybe had lots of massages and is very comfortable with being with a male.
I’m interested in the series of videos that you've created with Artie the Taoist Masseur - you’re showcasing different sensual massage strokes, sensual massage strokes. Do you think that's something that we should all have in our repertoire, the ability to sort of give a sensual massage?
It can definitely help. I do training for people who want to learn how to give a sensual massage, not professionally, but like to their partner.
Because sometimes people can rush into sex and it's almost like it's a race to, you know, penetration and orgasm and it all happens too quickly. Massage really helps to slow that down - it's a seduction.
Has your massage work changed the relationship that you have with your body in any way? The way that you experience intimacy?
Well, I think it's made me slow down and understand that like, yeah, that there isn't that goal.
It's made me more confident in my body.
What about your exhibitionist kink? Do you have to take that to new levels now? Do you need to find new ways to be an exhibitionist?
I've done a couple of live shows. I do some parties - massage parties, where I'm the masseur and the intention is that you help get things going at the party.
I'm bisexual. The vast majority of my massage clients are guys but the massage parties are mixed, so that’s fun.
If someone was a bit curious but maybe a bit nervous about experiencing a sensual massage, what advice or guidance would you give them?
I mean find a good masseur, first of all - find someone who's a professional.
Just enjoy it as a massage and see how you feel and then maybe, you know, book an hour because then you're not committing too much.
Then, if you feel comfortable with the person, then you can go back and explore a little bit more next time.
Have a nice massage, enjoy the nakedness, and then explore further at your own pace. A good masseur will respect that.
