What are the main distinguishing features between conventional and adult dating sites? You’ll find the first difference in the terms and conditions. Most regular dating sites have policies against nudity or sexual content in user profiles, and there isn’t really a place to share that kind of content on these platforms except via steamy text chats. Speaking of text chats, that brings us to the next difference: many adult dating sites like Gaydar offer free adult chat that can be enjoyed through either text or video chatting. When you combine open-minded user policies with video chats, you get an online dating experience that offers so much more than a regular dating site.

This changes the game a bit, and with a different game comes different rules. Finding a date on an adult dating site isn’t rocket science, but you might as well know a few tips beforehand rather than finding out the hard way.

A quick note: on some adult dating sites, the emphasis is on interacting with random matches instead of browsing profiles, which could be a relief for people who are tired of the standard online dating hamster wheel. Just know how your chosen dating site is set up for users, and your expectations are more likely to be met.

To start out with, choose whether you’re going to use text chat or video chat

Text chatting on an adult dating site gives you more flexibility than on a regular dating site, but there are still a few similarities. If you want to begin with text chat, that’s fine – loads of people prefer that if they just want to dip their toes in the water. You don’t have to worry about how you look, what your background is like, or how strong the WiFi connection is; all you have to do is make sure you’re there to respond. Since you’re there to hopefully connect with someone as you text chat, here are a few tips that should help you avoid shooting yourself in the foot:

Maintain the pace of the conversation

If you’ve asked a question, give the other person time to respond. Try not to send super long, complicated messages; keep it simple, especially at first.

Be clear about what you want

This isn’t because you’re selfish; at the end of the day, you’re there for you. Be clear about what you’re looking for, but also give them plenty of space to express themselves too; after all, this is a two-way street. There’s no need for either of you to drag on the interaction if you aren’t really interested, so if they seem to be beating around the bush at the beginning, don’t be afraid to be direct.

You could prefer text chatting at first, while the other person only wants to stick around for people who’ll do video chats; if you end up being incompatible for one reason or another, just move on. Assuming your chosen dating site has a few thousand users, there will be plenty of fish in the sea!

Avoid basic errors

Keep in mind that when you’re text chatting, the other person has two sources of information about you. One is what you actually tell them, and the other is the way in which you tell them. Specifically, your general writing style – including typos, emojis, abbreviations, personal shorthand, etc.

Excessive emojis make you seem vapid, too many typos makes it look like you just don’t care, and using a bunch of abbreviations instead of actual words can make you sound a bit robotic. In a real-world relationship that probably wouldn’t be a point of criticism, but if that’s all someone knows about you, you can’t really blame them for using that to form their opinion of you. Long story short: just proofread. It’s not that hard, and it pays off in the end.

Video chatting takes a little more planning, but it can also be a lot more fun

This is where adult dating sites really set themselves apart from the average dating site. By letting users video chat with each other – and by letting them participate in adult activities via webcam – they let people actually date online, instead of just facilitating the introductions.

Take advantage of the versatility of video chats.

It never hurts to optimize what you’re presenting on video chats, especially when you’re online dating. Think of it as getting ready for a real-life date: you’d make sure you looked presentable, put on some nice clothes, decide on a venue, and set aside some time so you weren’t distracted.

Video chats might not be quite as complicated, particularly if you’re still searching for a romantic interest, but you’ll definitely improve your chances if you pay attention to your appearance, as well as to the background that other users will see on their screens. Assuming you don’t need to be told to brush your hair, one of the top things on the list is lighting. Webcams are much less forgiving than human eyes, so try to make sure your light source is coming in at a flattering angle. As for the background, you can go the generic route with a basically clean and pleasant environment, or you could use it to signal your intentions – video chatting from a candle-lit bedroom, for instance.

Use video chats as a venue for intimacy

Meeting strangers is great, but people don’t use adult dating sites to make friends. If you feel a connection with someone and you both want to take things to virtual fourth base, then go for it – that’s what the site is for!

What’s your idea of a hot online date?

With thousands of people worldwide using these sites, you’re bound to find an awesome date eventually. Results aren’t guaranteed, of course – after all, this is still online dating – but the above tips should help set you apart from the pack. All you have to do is pick the right adult dating site and try your luck!

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